The scent of a woman

BEFORE SCHOOL: This is my aggressive, sword and gun wielding 5-year-old





Mitch came home from kindergarten and my nose immediately went into overdrive. A very heavy odor had invaded my house. It smelled like someone had found all the old-lady perfumes and thrown them on my son. I went right to him and started sniffing like a bloodhound. His hair smelled mildly sweet but that was due to the mousse we apply prior to school so the girls will think he's cute. He caught me mid-sniff and said, "I know I smell gross, mom. It's the lotion Mrs. D made me wear since we're learning about smells."
Mystery solved. An object lesson of the senses. But why couldn't she have used a more masculine scent for the boys? Like dirt, or sweat, or beer (just kidding on that one, of course!)


AFTER SCHOOL: Once he smelled like a woman he turned into one! (durn kid refused to be my total prop as he wouldn't wear the pink dress I found for him)

MATTERS OF GRAVE IMPORTANCE

There is a lot happening in the world to be concerned about. How will the Florida primaries turn out? Global warming--to be concerned or not? The economy, poverty, etc. But there is a matter that I am concerned about closer to home. Why does my only daughter barely have any hair?? Her three older brothers were not hairy babies by any means, but they warranted haircuts by the time they were her age of 16-months. I get ridiculed for constantly putting headbands on her, but it's a matter of gender identity and not vanity. Without her little bow she is mistaken for a boy!

Many have told me to be grateful that I am not combing snarls out every morning and wrestling hair into ponytails. But I have never been one to turn down a challenge----bring on the tender scalp screams, I am ready for some fun 'dos already!
(I've included front and back shots so you know she doesn't sport a really long mullet. And do you think her playing with a large-boy toy is resulting in her hair follicles being gender-confused?)

A Craft Gone Bad

I was in charge of our neighborhood preschool group last week. Mind you, this group consists of all three-year-old boys so whatever lesson we are trying to teach them gets interrupted with lots of wrestling, hitting and begging for snacks. Often the crafts/activities we do are more to impress the other mothers in the group than to impart any real wisdom in the children as they tend to be unaware why they're there.
I was teaching about hibernation and went to a few great websites to find ideas. Whenever I do crafts with children (very rare occurrence) I have 3 requirements: 1. It must be simple, 2. It must be cheap, 3. It must be simple and cheap. I found a great idea that met the requirements and settled on it. Unfortunately the finished product didn't quite look like I imagined as you can see.
WHAT IS IT SUPPOSED TO BE? Two bears hibernating in a cave. The original idea said to use actual dirt and grass to represent the forest floor. But I wasn't about to dig through the snow and ice to be that authentic. And I thought the paper cup would look more cave-like and less paper cup-like. Oh well, needless to say, this is one craft that has already been 'recycled' at our house.

Miracles do happen

I guess nobody is perfect. Roger Federer, the #1 men's tennis player in the world for 52 straight weeks, didn't make it to the Australian Open Finals. I am still slightly stunned. Maybe the 38 million dollars he's won in prize money (does not include endorsements) will help him get over his loss in the semis.

It's about time for a book review!

The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini I find book reviews fairly boring, so I'll try to keep this brief. I rarely read anymore for educational purposes---my mind needs pure fluff and escapism at the end of the day. So after seeing this book lauded everywhere I picked it up at the library and read the back cover. And I quickly placed it back on the shelf. No way was I going to relax while kids were sleeping with something that dealt with Afghanistan and the Taliban. But on another trip to the library I must have felt a little more desperate because I brought it home and I actually read it.
It's a compelling story about friendship and the setting just happens to be in a tumultuous country. Books like this remind me that I am so stinkin' lucky to live in this country. I am also reminded that there are people just like me on the other side of the globe enduring incredibly hard circumstances. But I didn't realize those things as I read it---I was just reading a good book. There are some Mature Elements in this book (always has to be a disclaimer, right?) so look at other reviews before you jump in. There. That was my first official adult book review. Next time we'll discuss the thematic elements of The Little Engine that Could. bye

A little snow won't stop us!

Noelle---the pink marshmallow

Why build a snowman or make snow angels when you can pull out the summer toys and try to plow through the yard with them? Now if we could have just dug out the sandbox.......

The Token Vegetable

I have given up. Why spend time and money on exposing your child to a variety of vegetables when they won't eat them? And then you get angry at the family dog, AKA Dad, for not eating all the leftover soggy veggies that have been marinating in the fridge for weeks. I have tried the tricks----turning vegetables into cute creatures doesn't make them more palatable for my children. They don't eat their toys (anymore) so why would a cauliflower snowman become more edible than the original form? Occasionally I can grate them into a sauce with nobody noticing, but eventually I am always found out--- "This tastes DIFFERENT, mom" in a voice which lets me know that different is not good. Or " AAAH! There is something GREEN in my spaghetti!" and we all know that nothing good is green.
So we have given up. For now. So with whatever wonderful dinner I have concocted I unceremoniously throw the bag of baby carrots onto the table as well. The one vegetable all four children can stomach. With plenty of Ranch Dressing, of course.

Winter Denial

Ethan, 3, has a very limited comprehension of what winter means. Several times a week he asks to go to the zoo, swimming, Lake Powell, the park, a parade, have a picnic, and other such activities that require a temperature that is not in the teens. For a kid who wears his Thomas the Train boots everywhere and insists on putting on his mittens to get into the car I will just call him Seasonally Dysfunctional.